WE ABSOULUTLY NEED TO KEEP BEING WHO WE ARE

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Bear with me for a moment if you will.

I swear this isn’t a political rant.

Nor is it a plea for the tolerance of hate.

I was completely devastated, and terrified by the results of the 2016 presidential election.

The current administration stands against anyone who is NOT : white, male, Christian.

I fall into a few minority groups:

Lesbian, woman, Buddhist.

I never thought hate would make its way into the White House in such a blatant way.

I’m not going to tell you that I think it will get better or that we should tolerate hatred.

However, I will tell you this: WE ABSOULUTLY NEED TO KEEP BEING WHO WE ARE.

I have to live my life based on spiritual principles. If I don’t I won’t be able to live. It’s easy for me to live my life from these principles when the rest of the world is acting in a peaceful and loving manner.

Ah, but this is where the proverbial “rubber meets the road”. Now I get to actually practice these principles in the face of hate.

That means that I have to keep showing up for life as the best person I can be regardless of what is happening in the world. I have to be kind and loving even when it is very, very difficult to do so.

May I propose this to those of you who were kind enough to read this:

Show up for life as a force of peace.

Be kind.

And above all, let the people in your life know what it is you value about them as individuals.

I say this because I can tell you from experience that some of us “minorities” may be feeling a little unsure right now. Letting someone know what it is you value about them can really let them know that they are valued as a person and not just summed up into a category.

I was blessed to have someone do this for me recently. It changed my point of view.

If you see an injustice taking place before your eyes, remember the victim. It is human nature to go after the aggressor. However, it is the victim that really needs comfort.

Now more than ever it is vital to go out of your way to be kind, show love, and do your best.

We are all in this together. Remember that above ALL ELSE.

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Freedom

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Due to the fact that today is Independence Day, I find myself thinking about freedom. I have been in the process of becoming freer over the past few months. I have been accepting life as it is more. And allowing myself to be who I am, thus facing my BIG fear of being rejected by the people I love. I am finding that my fear is unwarranted.

The more I live my truth, accept and love myself I am able to love others deeply and without reservation. I am losing interest in judging others. This does not mean that I do things perfectly. I make mistakes daily!

What it does mean : I am able to love others as they are because I am finally able to love myself as I am.

Buddha said: “The price of freedom is simply choosing to be, liberation is in the mind.”

True freedom is of our own making.

People reject other people and hate them because they cannot love and accept themselves completely. This is the most hidden of truths.

Just for today, I encourage everyone to accept yourself in all of your magnificence! Make no room in your heart for hate. Allow yourself to be free!

Happy 4th of July to all!

 

We Are Sacred

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A couple of years ago, I decided to make the day before Mother’s Day my own personal day. I’ve decided to call it My Other’s Day instead of Not a Mother Day. My Other’s Day has a more positive ring to it don’t ya think? 🙂 I realized quite some time ago that as a childless woman there is no celebration for me or those who are like me.

Childless women nurture the world by giving of their time and energy. We are the ones who pick up the slack, drive sick friends to appointments, rescue those in need, volunteer at various charities and organizations, answer the phone calls in the middle of the night, take the nieces and nephews to give the parents a much needed break. We are the confidants, the ones who can be trusted to show up when no one else is able. We stand in when a “Mom” is needed and the biological one is unable to be present (these are the moments we treasure). We are the friends you can always count on. And we still show up to help the Mother’s in our lives celebrate the children they were blessed with. We like the countless Facebook photos of cute babies and kids that Mom’s proudly post. We, celebrate birthdays, births, and milestones. We spend hundreds of dollars a year on gifts for the precious children that are not our own. And we love each and every one of those children with our whole hearts. We really get how special and important they are!

Women who are childless not by choice are sacred beings. We give of the time we have that is not filled with caring for children without asking for acknowledgement, gifts, or praise.

 

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To all of my sisters who did not get to be mothers: take today and acknowledge yourself. Do something nice for yourself. The world could not function without the contributions you make.

And please know how very special and important you are to me!

Remain Open

Epiphanies come upon me of late like waves crashing on the shore. Within the past few weeks I have come to understand that I have been standing in my own way.

I mostly have done this through my impossible expectations. I will have a picture in my mind of how things are supposed to be.

I will fall off of the edge and into the pit of dark despair when the picture never comes to fruition. I set expectations for myself that are not humanly possible to meet.

With people I will not trust what I see and know within myself about them because I want to believe the picture I create of them more than I want to know the truth they show me. When I can no longer push the truth down and it doesn’t match the picture I have created, I feel betrayed. I feel like I have failed.

Iyanla Vanzant sums up the reason my relationships failed

My only goal right now is to remain open. As a result, I am very sensitive and emotional lately. I find myself getting choked up and/or crying easily.

I am profoundly afraid. I have absolutely no idea what is going to happen or what I am doing. I never really did. I don’t think anyone does. However, up until very recently, I had those pictures that I had created. And I thought I was headed toward them.

My heart has been cracked wide open. I will allow it to remain so. Sprit has been guiding me to simply BE OPEN. So, I will simply be afraid. I will be confused. I will cry or become teary. I won’t apologize for it. I believe I am being guided to truly embrace all that happens instead of resisting it.

Epiphanies while driving last week

 

David Bowie: The loss of something deep and profound

bowieSIDE-WKP-091914_1I cried this morning when I heard that David Bowie had died. And, I must confess, I cried though out the day while I listened to his music. Bowie’s music has been a part of the sound track of my life since I was a child. When I was a much younger person he influenced everything from the way I dressed to the odd poems and journal scribbling’s that I wrote often in an altered state.

I always felt like he was singing Rebel Rebel to me as a young new-wave/punk girl who had very short hair and too much make up.

Rebel Rebel is my favorite David Bowie song. What’s yours?

He meant something deep and profound to me.

I know for certain that many of my friends feel exactly the same way.

David Bowie’s last album Black Star was released on Friday. It is absolutely beautiful. In fact, it’s one of the best albums he’s recorded. It’s atmospheric, melancholy, melodic, and strange in the best way. Bowie made this record while he was dying of cancer. It was released on his 69th birthday. The fact that he could make a record this good under such circumstances proves that he was a one of a kind talent that the world is likely to never see again.

 

 

2016 : What’s Out & What’s In

Last Week after the Burning Bowl Ceremony I had a powerful realization for 2016

The Buddha said that all suffering is caused by self-grasping. It has recently occurred to me that my grasping and striving is entirely the problem. Honestly, what have I been doing all of these years if not trying to achieve some goal or obtain some life style in order to complete myself thus growing my ego?

For 2016 I have make no resolutions, no goals, no plans. I am simply going to remain open. However, I am a big believer in starting any new year from the mind set of Out with the Old, In with the New. Here’s my list of what’s Out and what’s In for 2016:

Out

Expectations

Pushing down the truth and ignoring the guidance I am being given

Hiding my bisexuality

Being ashamed of how others see me

Placing so much importance on how others see me

People who take more than they give

Jumping into bed and making a relationship out of it

Negative people

Accepting intolerant people

Attachment to out comes

Complaining

Talking about my break up

Being afraid that I will not get a job in my field

Letting go of who I think I’m supposed to be and how my life is supposed to be

Self-grasping in order to grow my ego

In

Being on my own and not in a relationship or dating

Having a deeper relationship with my Goddesses (Kwan Yin & Green Tara)

Being proud of my sexuality

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Writing

Following the guidance of my Kwan Yin & Green Tara

Following my intuition

Allowing people to be who they are without trying to change them

Letting go of people that are unkind and intolerant

Speaking and thinking positively

Spending a lot of time with the people I love

Traveling more even if it is only a day trip and not an elaborate vacation

Completely letting go and trusting my Goddesses to connect me with a job where I can be of maximum service in the right way and in the right time

Being who I am and living the life I have been given with gratitude

Getting out of the way and allowing my Goddesses to lead

Believing who people are when they show me the first time

This year, I really hope that all of you find peace and love each day. Remember that we are all in this together. At the end of it all when we lay down for that final long sleep, we will not remember the jobs we had or the houses we bought. We will remember the people we have loved and how we treated them.